Rambling

I'm beginning to think working at Chuck E Cheese is bad for my health. I hit my head, actually it was more like I viciously attacked the lamp last thursday and it still hurts to touch my forehead. It didn't help that I had also hit my head earlier playing badminton in moccasins. Then Friday Becca thought it would be funny to jump up as high as we could to scare another(now former) employee not realizing that the lamps were right above us. So my head feels fabulous since now there is a whole new mountain range cropping up on it. I just thought everyone should know just how stupid we really are at cec. I'm think we're going to hit a record of being on the news soon.

So I guess what I'm getting at is that this was not one of my best weekends. I've been in an odd mood and bit people's heads off and I don't know what's wrong with me. I can normally brush something off but for some reason I took everything way too seriously the past few days. Maybe everything that has been building up just needed to some out. The worst part is that I think stuff and I want to say it to those people but I know if I do in that state that I will regret it and hurt them so I don't talk to those people. I make them stay away not because I don't want them around but becasue I need them to let me calm down so I can gather my thoughts.

Then on top of that my mom decided she wanted to yell at me all weekend again but that's become a little bit of a routine for us lately. I wish she would stop being rude because it's not working for her. She always complains about not wanting to lose another daughter but what she doesn't realize is that she's pushing me away more and more everyday. I have a great family don't get me wrong. I know there are people that have it so much worse than me and I know it's kinda my fault this happened. I've realized that my parents aren't who I thought they were a few months ago. They've changed. I've changed.

I recently talked to a girl who was a year ahead of me in high school. We played soccer together and had some classes as well. She said I was a completely different person than she remembered. I looked totally different. We talked for a while and she explained how I finally looked like a girl not like that freshman that she remembered with the huge shirts that had the stupid sayings on them. I walked with confidence. I don't remember everything she said but it just took me by surprise. I knew I had changed but was it really that much of a change? Another friend described how much I had changed since the fall and that one was pretty drastic but I think she was exagerating out of anger and frustration.

So this was really just me rambling about everything and procrastinating writing two papers. I'm suppose to stop procrastinating as a stress reliever in health. I don't know how well that's going to go. I'm trying though.